You can't pay enough money to cure that feeling of being broken and confused

Wow. I don't know how I can do this anymore. I have a thousand thoughts racing through my head. My heart is pounding and it feels like it's about to blow up. I don't know what I did. Was that a mistake? Why am I still trying? I'm so confused! HELP ME! Someone please. I'm desperate! I don't understand. Everytime I think I do something nice. Something to show how much I care. Something to show I want this to work I get shot down and I feel absolutely and completely STUPID. But I guess it's not suppose to work. I need to run. Run far, far away from everything. I need to scream. Everything is built up inside and it's about to blow. I can't be here anymore. I can't do this. I can't believe I'm so stupid to believe there still was a chance. But why do you say those three words? Those three little stupid words! They always get me. "I love you". I hate them! I hate those words! Your actions are suppose to prove what you feel. Anyone can open their mouth and say three stupid little words. This is getting so out of control. Am I insane? is this all just a dream? I don't know what to think. I don't know what to do. I simply give up. . .